how-to’s | Girl Meets Life | a lifestyle blog by Gracie Gordon

on knowing your identity.

12 August, 2014 by Gracie 12 Comments

(…can you tell this is going to be a bit of a kumbaya post? Okay, great.)

The process of fundamentally knowing who you are is one that seems to haunt the lives of most twenty-somethings. We’re told that this is the decade of “self discovery” and “making your future a reality.” That seems like it would be an exciting and fulfilling journey, right? You’d think we’d all want to jump right into it and do whatever it took to be the best, fullest version of our true selves, right?

………right???

This could just be my personal experience, but I found myself avoiding this process for a few years. Coming to terms with who I really am in a world and culture that is constantly TELLING me who I am wasn’t exactly easy. Discovering my identity – as a woman, friend, New Yorker, future wife/mother, daughter of God - is definitely still a daily work in progress, but I do think I’ve made huge strides over the past 1-2 years in knowing who GRACIE is, and living accordingly.

What I’ve come to really learn is that the most confusing and difficult thing about knowing your identity is actually LIVING IT OUT. What I mean is that I think deep down inside we all know what our passions, dreams, vision and values are. But when we face certain circumstances in life like job situations, relationships, financial issues, etc. we can lose our footing a lot more easily because we don’t have a firm identity to fall back on.

But when we know our identity and what we truly want out of life…

It provides clearer goals to aim for.
The need to please others diminishes.
It makes most decisions much easier to make.
It makes life more fulfilling overall!

That’s why I think it’s so important to actively be on a continuous journey of knowing your identity and being self aware. I’m a huge proponent of journaling for a handful of reasons, but one of them is to give you something to go back to and REMEMBER some of these things when you’re facing a difficulty in life.

So here’s an easy practice that I know has helped me a lot (idea originally from Jessi), and it might be worth a shot for you too.

In a journal, make a separate list for each of the following:

1) All of the things that make you YOU. Don’t hold back – write anything that comes to mind.

2) All of your favorite things in life. Hobbies, movies, places, feelings, etc.

3) Things you hate/don’t enjoy doing.

4) What you want your future to look like.

5) Things you want to improve/change about yourself.

6) What your values are. Non-negotiables that you know you want and deserve.

Making these lists in and of itself is a great step in learning more about your identity, but like I said above – I think the real value in having these lists is being able to refer back to them when facing certain challenges in life.

I know for me, I can get so caught up in trying to dissect and figure out certain life situations (work, relationships, decisions about my future, etc.). But when I sit down and remember these fundamental things about myself and my worth – it makes those things much easier to figure out and act on appropriately.

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What are your thoughts on this? Do you feel like you’re self aware/know your identity?

chocolate covered coconut bars + how to make healthy desserts that actually taste good.

11 August, 2014 by Gracie 15 Comments

While I was away last month we had a little family reunion of sorts. My whole dad’s side of the family came over for a day of fishing/hanging out at the shore house.

As usual, we had a huge spread of delicious food – meatballs, lasagna, salads, appetizers, and of course desserts. I always try to contribute a dessert or two, but I tend to stick to more crowd pleasing ones…AKA those including butter, sugar, and all that good stuff.

This time around, though, I wanted to experiment with a bit of a healthier dessert and see how my family liked it.

…I found a winner.

Original recipe can be found here

Seriously – my entire family was obsessing over these coconut bars! Even my dad – who (very lovingly) can be my toughest critic

The bars are easy to make (no baking involved), include just a few ingredients, and most importantly – are ridiculously good.

This recipe also covered all the bases for what I think is key when it comes to making healthy desserts that people will actually WANT to eat.

1) Use real, natural sweeteners – not artificial ones!
Let’s be real – artificial sweetener in baked goods tastes like chemical crap. I’d much rather use local organic honey, maple syrup, or brown rice syrup. YES I know those are still sugar, but I personally think it’s a better choice than artificial (both taste and health wise).

2) Keep it simple.
If a recipe seems like it has a lot of wacky ingredients, it’s probably a red flag. I like sticking to recipes that have as little ingredients as possible, and ones that are recognizable/would make sense to be in a dessert. For example, I just can’t do protein powder in desserts. Things like dark chocolate, whole oats, and bananas? Those I can do.

3) Consider your audience.
On that same note, I knew I wasn’t going to win anyone over with protein flaxseed quinoa black bean brownies. I chose a recipe that was simple, had ingredients most people love, and looked/tasted like a “normal” dessert.

4) Go nutty.
Nut butters and coconut are your best friend when it comes to healthier desserts. They’re delicious and full of natural healthy fats and protein.

5) Take others’ word for it.
Last but not least, the best way to find a healthy dessert that tastes good is through word of mouth. I got the recipe for the Chocolate Covered Coconut Bars from my friend Jenn who swore by them. I also love the recipes on PaleOMG and Oh She Glows, as well as just browsing Pinterest.

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But then of course, there are the times that you’ve just gotta make the real deal (which, to me is most of the time when it comes to dessert!). In those cases, Cake Batter Blondies are always a good idea…

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Do you have a go-to healthy dessert recipe?

#LEAN14 guest post: the truth behind losing baby weight.

6 June, 2014 by Gracie 2 Comments

“Body After Baby: See Which Stars Bounced Right Back!”

I read this headline on a popular celeb online magazine and it infuriated me, to say the least. The article listed how quickly celebrities drop their baby weight post-partum and included this statement: “One word: Wow! A mere 11 days after welcoming her son, Olivia Wilde was back to her normal look.”

Are you kidding me? 11 days? If I have to guess, I’d think it should also say: “A mere 11 days after welcoming her son, (along with a personal chef cook, personal trainer, multiple workouts a day, and a full-time nanny to watch her new born), Olivia Wilde is back to her normal look.”

After having my son, I soon became frustrated with my newly pudgy stomach and worried I would never be able to get back to my pre-baby self (both body and fitness-wise). But the best advice another mom gave me was, 9 months on, 9 months off. It takes 9 months to gain the baby weight, so you should also give yourself at least 9 months to lose it.

The first few weeks I started working out again post partum were pretty terrible, if I’m being honest. My motivation was lacking, my body seemed to hate me, and I didn’t see the instant results I was hoping for.

But I stuck with it no matter what. I continued exercising and eating better, and my consistency finally paid off. I reached my goal of losing 35 pounds.

Some people ask me what my “secret” is. My answer is always a lot of motivation. I made a list of attainable goals and stuck with them despite set backs, frustration and a hectic life.

What kept me motivated:

I wanted to become the type of person I want my child to aspire to be.
To set an example for my family to live a healthy lifestyle.
To be more energized, happy, and willing to take on new challenges.

(my grad school graduation - last month!)

Some of my non-negotiables still include:

Consistently working out – for me that’s at least five days a week. I’ve joined a kick boxing class at the gym, a soccer team, and a mommy running group which force me to make time for a sweaty workout!
A healthy diet with a little wiggle room. I eat a lot healthier now and also allow myself a cheat day (who can resist a good slice of pizza?).
Incorporating wholesome snacks into my day. My go-to favorite is a whole grain rice cake with all-natural peanut butter and raw honey.

So I guess this is as good as a time as any to bare it all! Here’s a glimpse of my before and after baby bod – one that may have taken a while to attain, but one that is happy AND healthy.

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This post is brought to you by my good friend and college roommate Chrissy. Chrissy is a wife, new mother, and full-time career woman. She currently works as the director of committee relations for the Wound, Ostomy, Continence Nurses Society. Between juggling the responsibilities of work and taking care of her home and family, Chrissy enjoys running, playing soccer, and reading. She resides in Cherry Hill, NJ with her husband and son.

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Have you lost a significant amount of weight? What are some things you did to lose it and keep it off?